Don’t Take Anything Seriously

dont take anything seriously
dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously
dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously' seriously
dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously' seriously"
   » seriously
dont take 'dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously" seriously'
   » seriously" seriously' seriously
dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take 'dont take "dont take anything seriously"
   » seriously' seriously" seriously' seriously" seriously
seriously

The above can be generated using the following Java code.

public class Seriously {
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String w[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String sp = " ", q1 = "'", q2 = "\"", bl = "";
    for (int i=0;i<6;i++) { 
      for (int j=i;j>0;j--)
        for (int k=0;k<2;k++)
          System.out.print(w[k]+(k<1?sp:sp+(j%2==0?q1:q2)));
      for (int l=0;l<4;l++)
        System.out.print(w[l]+(l<3?sp:bl));
      for (int m=0;m<i;m++)
        System.out.print((m%2==0?q2:q1)+sp+w[3]);
      System.out.println();
    }
    System.out.println(w[3]);
  }
}

Or equivalently…

public class Seriously {
  public static void a(String s) { System.out.print(s); }
  public static void b(String s) { a(s + "\n"); }
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String c[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String d = " ", e = "'", f = "\"", g = "";
    for (int h=0; h<6; h++) { 
      for (int i=h; i>0; i--)
        for (int j=0; j<2; j++)
          a(c[j] + (j<1 ? d : d + (i%2==0 ? e : f)));
      for (int k=0; k<4; k++)
        a(c[k] + (k<3 ? d : g));
      for (int l=0; l<h; l++)
        a((l%2==0 ? f : e) + d + c[3]);
      b(g);
    }
    b(c[3]);
  }
}

And, with the aid of some universal solvent…

public class Seriously {
  public static void a(String s) { System.out.print(s); }
  public static void b(String s) { a(s + "\n"); }
  public static void main(String[] args) {
    String c[] = { "dont", "take", "anything", "seriously" };
    String d = " ", e = "'", f = "\"", g = "";
    for (int h=0;h<c[(c.length)-d.length()].indexOf("sly");h++) {
      for (int i=h;i>g.length();i--)
        for (int j=0;j<c[(d+e+f).length()].indexOf("rio");j++)
          a(c[j]+(j<d.length()?d:d+(i%"??".length()==g.length()?e:f)));
      for (int k=f.indexOf(f);k<(d+e+e+d).length();k++)
        a(c[k]+(k<(c.length)-f.length()?d:g));
      for (int l=d.indexOf(d);l<h;l++)
        a((l%c.length/(d+e).length()==g.length()?f:e)+d+c[(f+e+d).length()]);
      b(g);
    }
    b(c[c[(c.length+c.length)/c.length].indexOf("thing")]);
  }
}

But it’s probably not worth taking too seriously…

Harry Handelbar

Harry is a satirist in remission who now moonlights as a metaphysical desk jockey. He specialises in cosmic admin, recursive nonsense, and the occasional algorithmic incident report. One poem he wrote still hasn’t stopped, and several readers claim it whispers back during thunderstorms.